Relationships are always changing and going through smooth and bumpy phases. When you notice you’re struggling in your relationship, don’t worry too much. Healthy and stable relationships don’t just happen—people work really hard to achieve them. So, what can you do to get your relationship off the thin ice?
Communicate every day
Communication is top most important part of a relationship to build strong bonding, choose the way to interact with each other. The right way to practice this skill is to ask your partner relevant questions, listen actively and offer your honest opinion if asked for advice. If you just overwhelm your partner with nagging, worries, and stress, especially right after they come home from work, it will not result in anything productive. Instead, ask questions that matter to both of you and then offer your side of the story. While it’s very important to discuss heavy subjects, avoid doing so when you’re stressed, tired or emotional. Wait until both of you are calm to approach the topic again.
Reevaluate why you love each other
When you’re stressed and unsure of your relationships, try to go back and think about things that drew you to your partner in the first place. What is it that makes them different from the others? And do this still have that special trait? If you remind yourself of all the reasons why you started dating, you will most likely find reasons to continue dating. This will give even more strength to your relationship foundation. Also, ask your partner about your good and bad sides, be open to criticism and try to improve yourself.
Spend time together
Do you have a favorite restaurant you haven’t had time to visit in a long time? Do you remember the bench where you had your first park date? Spending time in places that have a meaningful history for you will help you keep the spark alive. Or you can go and experience some new memories together—excitement and adrenaline are great serotonin boosters that will make both you return home feeling great. Or, you can spend some time in a more intimate way. If you miss that initial passion in bed, you can keep things interesting with some naughty accessories. And you don’t have to visit erotic shops or anything similar. Just check out some sex toys online and you’ll get everything you choose delivered to your home. Discretion is guaranteed, of course. Being intimate is the best way to reconnect with your partner and enjoy the closeness of your relationship.
Don’t stonewall
This is a very passive-aggressive habit that’s highly unhealthy. Everything that you do that involves ignoring, stalling and refusing to participate is unhealthy stonewalling. These strategies are used to defeat opponents, not argue with your loved ones. Fights in relationships are neither bad nor unusual but make sure to discuss things in a healthy way.
Forgive and forget
If you have a habit of constantly mentioning negative things your partner did in the past, it will just bring you two further apart. The best thing you can do for yourself and your partner is forgiving them truly (if you think they deserve it) and leave things in the past. Lingering on negative emotions won’t help your relationships recover.
Set limits
Even though you’re in a committed relationship, you’re still your own person with unique dreams, wishes, and habits. So, it’s more than healthy to spend some time apart—distance makes the heart grow fonder. You can invite your friends for a night out or book an occasional spa day alone. Asking your partner to run errands (with kids if you have them) while you stay home and read or take a relaxing bath is also a great and cheap idea. Just make sure to return the favor and set healthy boundaries both of you will respect. Time spent apart will maintain your relationship within healthy bounds and allow both of you to grow and practice respect.
It’s never worth staying in an unhealthy relationship that makes you feel scared or worthless in any way. However, most normal relationships also require effort in order to work and provide people with warmth and love. If you use these strategies listed above, you will certainly save your rocky relationship and get to enjoy all the benefits of a loving bond.
About the author: Mike Johnston is a freelance writer with a focus in home improvement, interior design, relationships, family life, and sustainable living.
